Saturday, October 14, 2006

so I was talking to a friend the other day. I asked her if it was self-centered or selfish to want a pretty wife one day. I asked because the most beautiful women in the world don't think they're much to talk about when they have waken up to see the same face each day. However for the rest of us, it takes our breath away. Certainly having a beautiful wife would only be for my benefit. However she did ask me, "when a friend wants to help you, get you a gift, or serve you, wouldn't you want to show that person that you really needed help, or that they were a life saver. Wouldn't you want to make them feel good about serving and caring for the one they love? If this person was your wife, wouldn't you want her to think that she sets your world on fire? So..you should marry someone you think is pretty, not because it's for your own status, or vanity of having a hot wife. You marry that person cause they deserve to have someone that is all about them. That really appriciates them, thier beauty, thier personality, thier passions. After all, you want our wife to think your hot, if not how would that make you feel. What would happen to your confidence, or vise versa for the woman. How much better would she feel vs having a man that things she's average. No, that would be a shame.

so she didn't say all that, but I have a reasured view on this now. I dont' feel as bad about persueing a girl, and that it's not out of selfish crap.

Ya know I've noticed a pattern in the past three girls that I've gotten close to, that after I've gotten past initial stages of "does this person like me or not" I turn into a different person. I can stare her right in the eye, and not flinch a bit. I'm in the zone. I'm cool and confident, never loosing composure. I just wonder why I'm not like this more often. Why my confidence can't be like this more often, and why I can't just put up a sign that says "this is what I'm all about, this is where I'm going. Check it!" Nope, instead I end up secound guessing, worrying too much. I was thinking about this the other day, and I was like, "why don't I just try to find that zone and stay in it".

So I'm going Sal-la-sa tonight. Should be a great time. Last week went really really well. This week will be even better because some friend of mine are going along. Check it sucka!

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